What I have learned in my 40 years…

Most people have the list of 40 things to do by 40. I decided that my list would be different. My list is 40 things I have learned before I turn forty. I would like to share these things with you. 

1. Confidence can change any insecurity into your greatest asset. If you know who you are and love who you are. 

2. Happiness is a choice that is contagious. Make the right choice, for yourself and for others. 

3. Constructive criticism can teach you something about yourself if you are open to it. 

4. Be a good person from morning until night. Be good, not perfect but good. 

5. Do something that you love daily, a walk, write, paint. If you love it, do it. 

6. Shut off and be still. Take the time to listen to what needs to be heard. 

7. Gratitude be thankful for all that you have and soon you will realize that you are richer than you thought. 

8. Self-care, treat yourself well, care for the parts of you that need it when they need it. 

9. Friendships, be the type of friend that you need. 

10. Relationships, allow each relationship to come and go as they are needed. Sometimes we can grow out of people and that is ok because then we make room for someone new. 

11. Positive attitude, be the kind of person who is happy for a glass, whether the glass is full or empty. Be positive.

12. Enjoy the small moments. There are so many and you wouldn’t want to miss them all. 

13. Laugh, there is nothing better for your soul than a great big belly laugh.

14. Smile. Greet the day with a smile and greet others just the same. Smile when you see your reflection. You are awesome.

15. Eye contact, look people in the eyes and show them you are happy to know them. You will be amazed what a little eye contact can do for your Spirit.

16. Learn something new, a sport, an instrument, a language, anything. There is a world of possibilities out there waiting for you.

17. Admit it when you are wrong. We are never always right and being wrong will teach us to continue to learn.

What I have learned about Parenthood

18. Love your babies with all your heart and don’t hold back. I know it’s scary but it is worth every single moment. I promise.

19. Open up and be vulnerable with your children. Tell them stories about who you were when you were young. They love to know things about their parents before they were parents.

20. Have fun with them. It’s ok to be on the ground and playing with you child like a child.its ok to tell silly jokes and jump in the puddles. These will be their favourite memories of you.

21. Don’t take everything your child says personally. Someone taught me that a long time ago and it is so important. They could be going through something that we don’t know and they want to take it out on us. We are tough and can take it.

22. Do not blame yourself for things that are out of your control. We can’t fix everything and sometimes as parents, we need to learn the lesson of letting it go and learn it quick.

23. Let them grow at their pace and not at yours.

24. Show them how to not tell them how to. Be a good example for them that they can emulate in life.

25. Enjoy every moment with them. It goes way too fast and before you know it they will be out and on their own.

26. Be their safe place to fall. Welcome them home from their hard days with a great big hug and a whole lotta love.

27. Listen to them. Really listen. They have amazing things to say.

28. Be their parent and not their friend.

29.Let them be kids. Don’t rush them to grow up.

30. Respect them. Gotta give it get it.

31. Say you are sorry when you are wrong. In order for a child to learn how to truly be apologetic they have to see it.

This is what I have learned as a wife about marriage…

32. Two hearts have become one but remember you are still your own person.

33. Love your spouse the way you want to be loved.

34. Show them that you love them, every day. Be the wife you’d want to come home to.

35. They are your partner and not your child. Treat them as such.

36. Quality time, make sure to have time with just the tow of you that is quality and not quantity.

37. Allow yourself time alone or with a friend to recharge your batteries. And the same goes for your spouse.

38. Make sure to have physical contact daily, from an arm stroke, to a hug or kiss or even a butt squeeze. This shows love to your spouse more than you know.

39. Be their friend and their spouse. Always have their back 100%. It’s you together against the world. You need one another.

40. Say you are sorry and mean it when you have been wrong.

Bonus lessons…

41. If you are having a fight remember to fight by leaving one another’s dignity intact. Don’t give low blows or say something you will regret.

42. Be your spouse safe place from the world too.

43. Don’t give up. Marriage is hard but worth it and it would suck to give up on something wonderful. 

44. LOVE. Be love, show love and most importantly feel love. 

These are the 44 most important things that I have learned in my almost 40 years. What have you learned?

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